Darkest before dawn
by WhiteCross85
Summary: Clays lost Jeff and after that night with hannah he thinks he lost her too, so he chooses to try and end it all.


**one shot. Again don't own anything, just a fan who wishes for a happy ending**

I am floating in nothing, darkness surrounds me. I feel nothing, no pain, no happiness, no regret, no hopes no dreams. I am just floating in peace.

"shit clay!"

It's distant, almost like an echo of a child calling from the mouth of the deepest cave on the planet.

I suddenly feel a tug on the back of my t shirt, it jerks me suddenly, then I am floating again.

"help me with him...grab his legs we have to get him out of the water!"

That echo of a voice again, another sudden jerk downwards. It's like their is a fishing line hooked into the back of shirt, every time that echo sounds the line jerks me down, momentarily disturbing the perfect peace in which I float.

"Clay, bud, I need you to throw up for me...come man, clay?"

Another tug, more forceful. It seems to pull harder as the voice becomes more in focus.

"clay, please...please helmet"

A massive tug down, "helmet?" I know that word...I know that voice, a sweet voice...I like that voice.

"please! Helmet, please listen to my voice, please"

She sounds sad. This sing a jerk, I'm falling now, falling through the darkness.

"come on clay, throw up man"

Falling faster, the darkness turns to a golden yellow, then white. I can feel...something...wet, wet material around my...my...legs?

"come on helmet, please"

Hands, I feel hands in my hair. I feel pain, pain in my stomach, burning pain...so much pain.

I can't feel my left hand though...the pain is spreading, it's clawing it's way through my body.

I crack an eye, barely. I can see the owner of the sad voice.

"Hannah?" I breath weakly "sorry" my eyelid falls shut again.

And then, I'm floating.

...

The birds sang on the beautiful summer day, but Hannah baker didn't hear them, she sat outside liberty high, her bag beside her, a text book open on her lap, but she didn't see it. She starred into space not really focusing on anything, she was unaware of her silent tears as they generally ran down her face.

She didn't know how long she had been sat there like that, and would of more than likely stayed like that for the rest of the day if it hadn't been for the horn of the red mustang before her.

"Hannah! Hey, you in there?" tony called from the drivers window.

She jolted back to the present, suddenly feeling the trails of the tears on her cheeks.

"what is it Tony?" she called wiping the tears, trails and her eyes with the sleeve of her coat.

"I'm going to visit Clay, you...you wanna come with?" he called back watching her gather up all her things.

" I can't Tony." Hannah stated standing up "I have things to do" she finished hugging herself as she started walking.

Tony slammed the mustang in reverse and backed it up so he cut her off.

"get in the car Hannah" he said pointedly.

"Tony, I...I can't okay, he doesn't want to see me anyway, not after...the party...and Jeff." She sighed defeatedly, feeling the tear prick her eyes again.

"he asked about you" Tony smiled softly " he always dose"

They paused in silence, Tony allowing his words to sink through the dark clouds that surrounded Hannah.

"he misses you" he continued softly.

Hannah looked up at the man in his car.

" come on, please?"

"okay" she whispered moving around the mussel car and opening the passenger door.

The trip to the hospital was silent, Tony stole glances over to Hannah every now and then, after a while he sighed and slid a CD into the player. Hannah starred out the window, her mind racing a hundred miles a minute, or it was until the song started.

The song that played at the last winter fling, the slow song she had danced to with clay, the slow song that played in that perfect moment. She turned hitting the eject button quickly.

"hey, I'm sorry, just thought it would cheer you up a bit" Tony gently apologised.

Hannah sat for a moment breathing heavily her eyes locked on the ejected CD.

" it's...its just, that song has a beautiful memory attached to it." Hannah said apologecticaly "I don't want to listen to it now, in case...in case he...hates me...the memory would be ruined" she explained weakly.

"man" Tony scoffed shaking his head with a tired smile.

He caught hannah glaring at him from the corner of his eye.

"you two are really something." He teased. " he thought you hated him, that's why he's bee n so distant" he explained shaking his head again.

"I don't hate him!" hannah snapped shocked "I don't think I could hate him..." She trailed off.

" you two really need to learn to communicate better" Tony chuckled pulling the car into the parking lot.

The pair walked through the automatic doors and approached the desk, an elderly nurse who looked to have seen better days glared over her half moon glasses at them.

"hey, were here to see Clay Henson." Tony stated with a happy tone.

" room 182" the elderly nurse snarled jerking her thumb in the direction of a corridor.

"thank you" Tony beamed as he guided Hannah down the hall.

Sat outside of room 182 was a bearded man, he looked so tired and stressed, the bags under his eyes showed the extent of the sleepless nights.

"hey Mr jenson" Tony said as they approached

" Tony, hi...how are you?" he greeted as he quickly stretched out his limbs before firefly standing to his feet and offering the young man a hand.

"I'm very well thank you sir" Tony smiled politely as they shook hands.

Tony saw his eyes look over him and to Hannah.

"Mr Jenson, this is Hannah Baker, she works with clay and goes to school with us" he introduced stepping aside so Hannah could be seen properly.

"ah, the famous Hannah Baker" Mr Jenson smiled shaking Hannahs hand " Clay talks alot about you, he's very fond of you" he beamed at her.

" it's a pleasure to meet you sir" hannah said softly.

"is clay awake? Can we see him?" tony asked quickly, ensuring to avoid an awkward silence.

"uhh, yes, yes go on in, I'm sure seeing you will make his day" Mr jenson said falling back into the plastic chair.

"hey Clay, how you doing?" tony asked walking through the door.

"I'm the same tony" he answered with his normal forced half smile "how's Hanna..."

"should be more concerned with yourself helemt" hannah answered sheepishly from the door way.

"hey" Clay managed after flapping his mouth a few times.

"hey yourself" hannah smiled as she walked to is bedside.

"I'm going to give you guys some time" Tony smiled as he backed towards he door " cause you two really need to talk, I mean REALLY need to talk" he finished backing out of the room and closing the door.

The pair stayed in silence for moments, Clay snatching glances at her, admiring her beauty committing it to memory, Hannah doing the same.

"why?" Hannah asked suddenly sitting on the end of is bed and looking away "why did you do it?"

"I...i...dunno" clay stammered nervously

"bull shit clay" hannah snapped angrily " you don't take a bottle o pills and slit you wrist on a whim." The last word escaped as a sob.

" after the party...wen you told me to leave...i thought...i thought you hated me, the hurt you, that I lost you and then je...jeff, I couldn't live with myself for hurting you, and i could of stopped jeff, i could of done something about the assholes at school for the shit they said about you" he explained quickly, hardly breathing between words. "I felt like a failure, I failed Jeff and I failed you the only girl I've ever really liked." He finished looking down at the bandage around his arm.

"you like me?" Hannah asked looking over to him, her eyes wet with tears.

"no" clay sighed. He closed his eyes tightly and took a deep breath "i love you" he clarified

He kept his head down , his eyes shut and took another deep breath before stating " and I'd never hurt you, not intentionally, and when I do I need you to tel, me what I did, I don't know what I'm doing Hannah, I've never felt like this, I'm scared I'll mess up and lose you, I want to be with you, i want to be your rock to lean on and your shield to hide behind and...and your sword when people hurt you."

He felt hannah move from the bottom of the bed and sighed.

"I'm sorry...i know tha" he was cut off by her lips pressing against his.

It took him a moment to get over his surprise at the kiss before he started to kiss back.

"don't apologise for tbat" hannah smiled breathlessly as he forehead rested against his "that was the sappyiest and most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me clay Jenson. And I think, I'm in love with you too"

She sat her eyes watching as the realisation of her words erupted within his eyes and a genuine smile played across his face. He quickly leaned forwards and captured her lips again in a soft loving, lingering kiss.

"wow" hannah smiled

"yeah, wow" clay agreed smiling.

"so what now? I mean do I ask you to be my girlfriend or..." He trailed off looking very confused

There was her helmet, always so socially awkward and clueless when it came to the opposite sex.

"Yes clay, I'll e your girlfriend" hannah chuckedled snuggling into him.

Clay beamed, he was pretty sure he was blushing and looked like an idiot, but he didn't care, Hannah baker loved him. Hannah baker was his girlfriend.

"Clay?" Hannah whispered against his chest " please don't ever do anything like this again" she asked, her voice weaker again. She had come so close to Losing him.

"if you won't then I can promise I won't" he whispered back.

"I promise I wont" hannah sighed content with the answer.

The door clicked open and Tony stuck his head round.

" bout damn time" he muttered to himself at the sight of the new couple.

"what's wrong?" Mr jenson said jumping to his feet.

"it's nothing sir, our boys just become a man" Tony reassured him with a smile as be closed the door again.

The end.


End file.
